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Fin de las disputas familiares

Estoy harto de que seas así. Creo que has elegido el peor momento de tu vida para evadirla, pero parece que vives de eso. ¿Por qué no lo enfrentas y ya?, ¿por qué? Llevas todo lo que tengo memoria haciendo lo mismo, pero así no se olvidan las cosas, así no se va la vida. Parece que ambos son expertos cómplices en evadir lo que pasa, o peor aún, ¡negarlo! Me gustaría que despierten algún día, que sepan que es necesario enfrentarlo, que es necesaria su ayuda.

No pueden tener razón siempre, pero tampoco pueden dejar que las cosas pasen así, y olvidar que ocurrieron. No puedo solo esta vez, ella tampoco. Es fuerte, muy fuerte, pero hay cosas en las que de verdad necesitamos estar juntos. No quiero parecer que reclamo algo, pero no puedo encontrar otra forma de decirlo.

Parece que siempre te esfuerzas por encontrar en lo más hondo de tu botella para pensar que ahí se encuentra la solución a los problemas, que el olvido está en el fondo (pero llevas toda la vida arrojando fondos a un vacío que nunca se llena, por más vidrio que acumules). Lo siento pero estoy harto de ti. Estoy harto de que sea tu forma de hablar, de que busques las respuestas justo cuando no puedes entenderlas, de que quieras saber algo de mi cuando no lo recordarás el día de mañana, pero parece que no eres el único, que vives de la complicidad o la complacencia de lo que pasa alrededor.

Y es que negarlo tampoco es la mejor opción. Fingir que nada pasa, tener fe y confiar en la esperanza es como tapar con un dedo toda la luz que recibimos del sol. Esperar que la magia, lo sobrenatural o los grandes espíritus que no entendemos vayan a encontrar bendiciones suficientes para solucionar lo que pasa en esta vida, te van a terminar acabando y van a terminar con tu fe.

No me gustaría resignarme a pensar que la vida es así, porque entonces mataría lo que queda de mí, pero estoy tan harto de que pase lo mismo, que me asusta… sólo quiero una cosa en esta vida: no la dejen sola.

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